The Next Time You Are Drunk, Post Here.

[ddk632]

I've always changed both of my kids' diapers. I'm proud of that shit!

[UncleWede]

If I got stuck in the prison with lil Shitkicker and her nappy were nasty, I *COULD* do it. But I might gag a few times. Why torture myself when there are others clamoring to do the duty themselves?

[ddk632]

Hey there is nothing wrong with delegating whenever possible.

[UncleWede]

Just like at the baseball field: NOBODY likes to keep the lines straight nor pull the weeds. I thrive on that shit. They just get out the way.

Wait, is this the bacon thread, or am I losing my memory again?

[ddk632]

You know you're getting bacon when

[Billup]

You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.

[954Stealth]

Originally Posted by Billup

You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.

Profound.

[tmdals0213]

Originally Posted by Billup

has anyone seen a baby giraffe?

FUCK MY LIFE. CUTEST THING EVAR.

idk why but im sure this is what the character Mr. Bean would have looked like in the giraffe world or when he was a baby.

[954Stealth]

Alright - whose starting already??

[Billup]

I'm 4 Miller Fortunes in. I left work early because some dipshit cut an optic line near the plant, so I couldn't get on my system all day.

So now I'm at home drinking with the old man talking to an 18 year old on Tinder.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by 954Stealth

Alright - whose starting already??

Where you at bitch?

[Revartr]

Anxiously awaiting tomorrow, so that I can have a drink. :|

[954Stealth]

Originally Posted by Billup

Where you at bitch?

Yo I'm here sorry I was chatting with hot babes. But now my hour is up.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by 954Stealth

Yo I'm here sorry I was chatting with hot babes. But now my hour is up.

I'm trying to woo an 18 year old right now. It's going so so. I will be out of town next week so it puts a damper on my game. Pissed off.

[954Stealth]

Originally Posted by Billup

I'm trying to woo an 18 year old right now. It's going so so. I will be out of town next week so it puts a damper on my game. Pissed off.

I am organizing phone numbers in numerical order. Should I start with the '1' numbers or the '9' ones?

I'm thinking '1' because if they put that they're probably on vacation and I'll just get the one shot (no pun intended)

[Billup]

Dude, you are way above my level on that one.


I barely know how to use my phone other than to text and call.

[954Stealth]

Originally Posted by Billup

Dude, you are way above my level on that one.


I barely know how to use my phone other than to text and call.

and pron. don't forget the pron... and baby giraffes.

[ddk632]

Billup wooing an 18 year old:

"I am your elder. Now, bring me bacon and sit on my face."

Because Tinder. And bacon.

[954Stealth]

[Billup]

Originally Posted by ddk632

Billup wooing an 18 year old:

"I am your elder. Now, bring me bacon and sit on my face."

Because Tinder. And bacon.

I am walking diligently around this one.


Anytime I show my true colors, people get offended. So I need to be all fucking mysterious and shit. Ruining my fucking vibe. But that's what it takes to get a lil summin summin.

[ddk632]

Originally Posted by Billup

I am walking diligently around this one.


Anytime I show my true colors, people get offended. So I need to be all fucking mysterious and shit. Ruining my fucking vibe. But that's what it takes to get a lil summin summin.

So, more like, "I am your elder. Maybe. Now, bring me some bacon. Then, I will reveal where you may sit. It may or may not be on my face."

That is a bit more mysterious, I think.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by ddk632

So, more like, "I am your elder. Maybe. Now, bring me some bacon. Then, I will reveal where you may sit. It may or may not be on my face."

That is a bit more mysterious, I think.

As much I personally enjoy where your head is at, to get a womans head where I would enjoy it, requires a little more accuracy in the word department.


I will however take that information for future reference if I ever feel like I need to lure you into my pants.