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Originally Posted by cmyx6go
I feel your pain and you sentiment that when it rains it pours. Up until two years ago, I lived across the street from my parents. I have two sisters that also live close but because they have families and I do not, I was the primary. I did the food shopping, ate with them every night. Mom was withdrawing and deteriorating but gradual. I picked up the slack. I moved 2 years ago so my sisters stepped up. Mom went downhill fast over the past two years. Fast forward, dad just finished radiation last month. Mom just got out of hospital a few weeks ago from pneumonia. She had no will to live or do anything to help herself. Dad distraught. My two sisters have been feeding them at night. Aides were there round the clock but parents pushed back they don’t want anyone there. Cut back to 8-4. But that left feeding them and clean up to us. One sister was bearing the brunt of it.
Yesterday, my sweet 16 year old niece was diagnosed with stage 3 lymphoma. She had a mass in her chest, will need chemo and radiation and need to ne home schooled. All our efforts and energy need to be put towards supporting my sister. I increased the aides to cover until 9pm and my parents are freakin they don’t want people in the house. WTF? I’m putting my house up for sale so I can be closer. I’m numb. My poor niece. She’s fucking 16. This isn’t supposed to happen. I can’t. My father is pissed as he feels out of control. My mother is fragile, on oxygen, we just had a chair lift installed on steps. She needs professionals to monitor her but the reality is hitting dad as is the loss of independence. Someone shoot me.
Sorry for rant and any typos. I slept there last night, woke up at 2:00 and couldn’t go back to sleep. I’m fried. I’m numb. I can’t process this. I love my parents. My niece is 16. She requires all the support right now.
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I'm so sorry for all the pain and chaos that life is throwing your way. I'll be faced with taking care of my mom one day, and I'm an only child so I won't have any backup. She's 80 and in amazing health but she'll eventually need help.
Be strong and keep us posted.